| | |  | Lindsay Lohan News & Gossip
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| | Lindsay Lohan's pleated, tapered pants & cardigan: improving or busted' | | Added 12 years ago | Source: CeleBitchy |
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As you may remember, Lindsay Lohan treats her court appearances like runway shows. She always leaks the details and designer IDs to TMZ too, so we know immediately that she?s wearing Lanvin or Chanel or what have you, even though pretty much every expensive designer piece looks totally bargain-basement tacky-ass on LL. It doesn?t help that she doesn?t adhere any of my general style rules for court appearances – go here to review. She usually looks like a day hooker who got busted by a corrupt undercover cop, and the hooker has to appear in the ?judge?s chambers? to work out a plea deal.
Anyway, yesterday?s court appearance was kind of different, though. TMZ did not got the details on LL?s outfit, so I have no idea whether her ensemble is designer or anything. Plus, LL was covered up. Mostly. I hate to admit that I actually like her cardigan. It?s cute, and I wouldn?t have rolled up the sleeves, but it?s a nice, neutral piece. The pants are pretty wrong – that?s some really dated, ?80s-style pleating. But should we give LL some credit for not showing off her saggy jugs and not wearing anything made of latex? Eh.
By the way, during the hearing, Judge Sautner specified LL?s rules for traveling out of the state of California while on probation. Sautner told her, ?There seems to have been some confusion on whether or not you were allowed to take vacation outside the state. Ms. Mansfield apparently thought your sister’s birthday was a holiday? In any month in which you finish your 12 days early, you may then travel.? So? LL needs to get 12 days done soon before she goes on some crackie jaunt to God knows where.
PS? I?m adding closeups of her crackface because it?s so amazingly gross. I really can?t believe what she?s done to herself. And the worst part is that she thinks she looks awesome. Bitch thinks she’s got this.
Photos courtesy of WENN, Fame, Pacific Coast News.
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| | Judge Praises Lindsay Lohan in Court | | Added 12 years ago | Source: The Blemish |
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Lindsay Lohan showed up to court this morning for her probation hearing and unlike the other ones, Judge Sautner had nothing but good things to say. She’s even paid $100 of her $3,900 legal bill.
Judge Sautner tried something new … rather than just telling Lindsay to complete her community service in a year — or else — the judge created a very specific schedule, putting in a certain number of hours each month. And Lindsay has not only complied, she’s gone beyond the minimum. Sources tell us … Lindsay logged the requisite number of hours of community service and morgue duty, and she’s actually put in more therapy time than required. TMZ
That’s amazing! Lindsay did slightly more than the bare minimum. That compliment isn’t loaded with sarcasm either. It’s only slightly tinged with it. I’m honestly shocked. This is the same girl that bailed on her Ellen interviewto promote herself because she was too busy partying in Hawaii that she missed her flight. What a glorious day indeed. One day, the judge might even call her “slightly above average.” That’ll bring a tear to the eyes of everyone.
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| | Lindsay Lohan misses flight to LA, misses 'Ellen?, due in court this morning | | Added 12 years ago | Source: CeleBitchy |
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These are photos of Lindsay Lohan arriving at LAX in the early evening yesterday. As soon as she arrived, she jaunted off to a Jay-Z concert. In yesterday?s Lindsay Lohan post, I asked when LL was due back in LA after her cracked-out Hawaiian jaunt. As it turns out, she was supposed to fly back to LA yesterday morning, but the dumb crackie missed her flight. Of course. Not only did she miss the early flight, she ended up standing up Ellen DeGeneres in what was supposed to be the ONE television appearance to ?debut? her Playboy cover. Dumb crackhead.
Alec Baldwin isn’t the only one having travel issues these days. Lindsay Lohan, who was scheduled to return from her hit-and-miss Hawaiian vacation today, missed her flight back to Los Angeles that would have had her back in town in time for a scheduled taping of The Ellen DeGeneres Show.
But more importantly, Lohan’s due in court bright and early tomorrow. She doesn’t need a passport to get back to the mainland, so what can the problem be?and will it keep her from her date with Judge Stephanie Sautner?!
“Lindsay had a travel-
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| | Lindsay Lohan's Aloha State Bikini Beach Romp | | Added 12 years ago | Source: Celebrity Gossip |
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Showing off her fun-loving spirit in an equally-flirty suit, bikini clad Lindsay Lohan hit the sand and surf of a beach in Oahu, Hawaii over the weekend.
Putting her curves on display, the 25-year-old starlet donned a multi-colored leopard-print two piece as she splashed about the Pacific as photogs happily snapped up shots.
The seaside sighting is most definitely a highlight in LiLo's Hawaiian trip, as earlier in her vacation Lindsay's purse came up missing - along with the ten grand she had tucked inside.
Meanwhile, following the leak of her nude Playboy pictorial, the mag has decided to push up the release of her issue. Lindsay's spread will now hit stands December 16th.
More Photos Here
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| | Lindsay Lohan due in court tomorrow, her probation report is allegedly 'glowing' | | Added 12 years ago | Source: CeleBitchy |
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Sigh? another day, another million stories about Lindsay Lohan?s crack drama. LL is still in Hawaii, where she?s getting ?pap?d? only it?s really obvious that she?s just setting up these beach photo shoots. You can see some bikini photos of her here – the one of her saggy ass makes it really obvious that those Playboy pics were Photoshopped to the extreme. Also, you know how LL?s purse was ?stolen? a few nights ago? Well, there an audio recording of LL ?freaking out? about her lost purse, and you can hear her crack logic at work as she tries to figure out how in the world someone took her $5000 purse with $10,000 inside from a Jeep with open windows. SHOCKING. At one point, she mutters, “I will f–king kill someone if I even have to get questioned? jail for a year.” Ah, crack dramz.
Meanwhile, Radar has a story about what might go down at LL?s progress hearing in front of the judge tomorrow. If she shows up? is she still in Hawaii? Is she flying back today?
Lindsay Lohan will be in court on Wednesday for a progress hearing in her theft case, and the Playboy hottie will have a glowing probation report, RadarOnline.com is exclusively reporting. So, could legal woes be a thing of the past for the Mean Girls star? According to our well place sources, the answer is, yes….hopefully!
“Judge Sautner gave Lindsay a new probation officer at her last court appearance. Her new probation officer is absolutely no nonsense, and she has seen it all. Lindsay has been a model probationer so far,? a source close to the actress tells RadarOnline.com. ?Lindsay has made scheduled meetings with her probation officer, has completed her court ordered community service requirement of 12 days by the progress report hearing, and attended all her psychological counseling sessions. Lindsay has actually completed more than the basic requirement of 12 days, and she is ahead of schedule to finish her duties at the morgue by March 29, 2012.?
As RadarOnline.com previously reported, Lohan, 25, served approximately 4 1/2 hours of a 30 day sentence for violating terms of her probation because she failed to show on multiple occasions at the Downtown Women’s Center. Judge Sautner had ordered LiLo to perform the community service at a downtown women?s shelter after pleading no contest in her theft case. Because of rampant jail overcrowding in Los Angeles County, Lohan only had to serve a fraction of her sentence.
Judge Sautner formally sentenced Lindsay at the last progress report hearing on November 2 to complete 53 days of community service at the Los Angeles County Coroner’s Office, and attend 18 psychotherapy sessions.
Saunter is keeping Lindsay on a very tight leash, ordering her to complete a certain number of hours for community service, and psychotherapy sessions – monthly until March 29, 2012. Failure to do so would result in an automatic 270 day jail sentence, which the judge suspended, pending successful completion of her terms.
?Lindsay calls her probation officer back immediately whenever she calls her, if she doesn’t answer the phone. Lindsay has really stepped up and accepted responsibility for her actions,? the source says. ?Lindsay is well liked at the coroner’s office, and she does whatever she is assigned to do, without complaining. For the first time in a very long time in Lindsay’s life, she is treated just like everyone else, which is exactly what she needs. She isn’t given any special perks nor has she asked for any.?
?It’s actually much more productive for Lindsay to be doing manual labor at the morgue, where they have suffered from budget cutbacks. If she were in jail, she would be in a cell for 23 of 24 hours a day, except for visits with her lawyer, or family. Lindsay couldn’t do janitorial work at jail because of the notoriety surrounding her, and it wouldn’t be safe for her or the other inmates.?
Meanwhile, the probation report will “recommend that Lindsay be allowed to remain on probation, because she is in compliance,” the pal says.
[From Radar]
I tend to believe this report – I think the Cracken has been following all of the rules and she?s been in full-compliance? this month. But maybe next month, or maybe the month after that? the old crackhead itch will start. LL is incapable of simply following the rules and adhering to a structure. She?s incapable of a long con – she doesn?t have the patience for it. She?s too crackie. She?ll mess up, just wait for it.
Photos courtesy of Fame and Pacific Coast News.
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| | Lindsay Lohan is Out Ten Grand, Airbrushing | | Added 12 years ago | Source: Yeeeah |
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An unretouched photo of Lindsay Lohan at her Playboy photoshoot hit the interwebs this weekend, clearly reinforcing my belief that everything in Playboy is really ninety percent photoshop wizardry. And speaking of wizards, Lindsay Lohan is a fucking dumbass. Case in point (via TMZ):
Lindsay Lohan’s purse [containing her] passport, important probation docs, and [ten thousand dollars in] cash was stolen last night from a Hawaii house party.
One of her friend’s eyed a suspicious-looking local, and asked if he knew where the bag was. The local denied everything, but showed up with the bag minutes later… claiming he found it on the street.
Lindsay was so ecstatic to have the bag back, she didn’t bother asking questions — despite the missing $10,000.
Who other than drug dealers carries ten thousand dollars on their fucking person? I was gonna say “who other than black people carries ten thousand dollars on their fucking person,” but I thought that sounded racist. So I went with “drug dealers” because that covers that base without me actually having to say it. You’re the racist for thinking it.
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| | Lindsay Lohan's leaked pictorial causes a major headache for Playboy | | Added 12 years ago | Source: CeleBitchy |
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GO HERE to see Lindsay Lohan?s full Playboy pictorial. Just go and come back, because we have some things to discuss.
You see, I didn?t talk about Lindsay Lohan?s Playboy shoot on Friday for several reasons – first of all, the full photo shoot was leaked DAYS before Playboy wanted it released, and chances were that Playboy?s lawyers were considering lots of legal actions to get the images taken down, considering that most people wouldn?t buy the magazine if they could see all of the firecrotchy images online – TMZ even reported that Playboy was ?freaking out? because they stand to lose a lot of sales. However, it looks like Playboy has just decided that now that the leaks are already out there, they should just go with it. Hugh Hefner tweeted that LL?s pictorial was going online early, the newsstand issues would be released earlier and that the issue “will make the perfect Christmas issue for men in your life ? father, son, husband, boyfriend, whoever.”
Another reason I didn?t want to talk about it: Crackhead exhaustion. I mean, the ?leaks? of the photo shoot are NOT some budget photos-of-photos crap – these are full-on quality scans of the actual magazine. Someone (cough) got their hot little crack hands on an advance of the mag, scanned the pages and released them. It?s such an obvious crackie move. She?s so obviously pleased with herself.
Now, shall we talk about the actual photo shoot? The shoot is based on the famous (infamous) Marilyn Monroe shoot with photographer Tom Kelley. In Marilyn?s shoot, she was very young and fresh-looking, lounging around on satin sheets, looking kittenish and rather adorable. The Cracken photos look like she?s been dipped in bleach and flea dip and then Photoshopped within an inch of her life. Don?t get me wrong – I was genuinely surprised that her body looks that good. Even if there is the motherlode of ?Shop, LL?s got the basics for a bangin? body. I was especially surprised with how pretty her boobs are, honestly.
BUT THE FACE. The face is rough. The face is trashy. The face is all kinds of terrible. Those horrible lips, that red lipstick, the lack of any real seduction or joy in her eyes. She?s just awful. Also – she didn?t show vadge. Does that matter? The shoot is just all T&A.
I also skimmed the ?interview? with LL – I don?t even care enough to transcribe it. She compares herself to Marilyn, of course, and talks about how she was really mixed up when she was 18 and 19. No mention of 20-25. One quote: “I have no idea why there is this fascination with everything I do.” BECAUSE YOU?RE A CRACKHEAD MONSTER.
Photos courtesy of Fame, WENN.
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| | Lindsay Lohan in 2007: 'I can dress like a princess and still fight like a whore' | | Added 12 years ago | Source: CeleBitchy |
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For whatever reason, the tabloids are full of Lindsay Lohan stories this week. My theory for the sudden reemergence of The Cracken: she?s going to be everywhere promoting her Playboy cover in the hopes that her dusty firecrotch will bring her career relevance again. The Enquirer has a BS story about that too – something about Linnocent being prepared to do ?anything? (wink, nudge, beej) to start working again. I know the report is BS because they claim LL is even prepared to dump Dina Lohan as her manager. That will never happen – Dina and the Cracken are forever intertwined now. They will never NOT coexist.
I?ll start with the Star Magazine story about LL?s 2008 ?diary?. Radar already released some of this a few days ago – in January 2008, LL was writing in her diary non-stop about Heath Ledger being the ?love of her life.? The print edition of Star had more details and diary entries, and I just want you to note how LL makes Heath?s death all about her. Her needs, her crack drama, her narcissism. It?s never NOT about Lindsay.
Jan. 22, 2008: ?Today, Heath died. I?m in love with him? He was the love of my life. He taught me so much, and he was everything I?ve ever wanted and more. I want to hear him laugh and hold me. I crave his touch and care.?
She writes that she had plans to visit Heath in New York on Jan. 25: ?He was going to meet my mom and everything.?
Lindsay reportedly broke down in tears at La Scala when she was informed of Heath?s death: When a person dies the world stops. I?m numb. There?s an emptiness. A whole [sic]. And a desire to feel loved. A need to be held in the arms of someone who understands. But what do you so when the one who understands is gone??
?I?m sick. My vision is blurred and it?s like a black hole has surfaced overhead. It?s like a game of Jenga, and when one piece slips, it all falls apart. One pill, one sip and it goes down the slope, crashes and burns and it?s over. Why? I ask myself over and over. Cry is all I can do.?
More than a week after Heath?s death, on Jan. 31 2008, LL wrote: ?Heath is a prime example of what this industry can do to someone. It craves to see someone fail? It brings enjoyment to us to watch one die. The tragedy and cravings for it can kill. And will. They have.?
[From Star Magazine, print edition]
The saddest/funniest line, in my opinion was, ?He was going to meet my mom and everything.? Dina Lohan and Heath Ledger were going to meet? how would that have gone? Did Heath even know that was happening? Or was LL just some girl he boned and LL built up the one night stand like it was the most epic crack drama of her life? Life is totally like Jenga.
Meanwhile, the Enquirer also had excerpts from a new book that?s making the rounds. It was written by a man named Lee Weaver, who was a ?Hollywood bodyguard? for more than 20 years. The book is Memoirs of a Celebrity Bodyguard, and Weaver details the year he spent on Cracken Detail:
Lee Weaver insists his worst client was Lindsay Lohan, whom he protected during most of 2007.
?When she was sober, she was charming. But when she?d done drugs or had been drinking, she was a demon!?
She once told Weaver: ?I can dress like a princess and still fight like a whore.?
And one night she almost got them both killed. Weaver says she called him at 4 a.m. and asked him to take her to Beverly Hills to ?pick up a script.? But when they got to the location, Lindsay approached a man waiting in the front yard and screamed: You ripped me off, you bastard!? With no warning, Lindsay ?slapped him so hard that I almost felt it.? She then slapped him again, Weaver writes, and ?before I could stop him, he held a gun to Lindsay?s face.?
Weaver moved in to save his client and found himself looking down the barrel of the gun. When a noise distracted the gunman, Weaver says he ?punched that man as hard as I could in the side of his neck.?
The man went down and Weaver sped away in the car with Lindsay.
[From The National Enquirer, print edition]
?I can dress like a princess and still fight like a whore.? That?s her epitaph. That or ?Move that headstone, I?m Lindsay Lohan!? Anyway, that story about Linnocent slapping some random – that?s her dealer, correct? Pretty much.
Photos courtesy of Fame.
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| | Lindsay Lohan Steps Out for Probation Department Duties | | Added 12 years ago | Source: Celebrity Gossip |
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Dutifully tending to her legal requirements, Lindsay Lohan paid a visit to the Santa Monica Courthouse in Santa Monica, CA on Wednesday afternoon (December 7).
Dressed in an all-black ensemble, the "Georgia Rule" starlet met with her probation officer for a brief appointment while exiting the building and giving ta wave to police officers before heading back home.
The legal doings come the same day as Miss Lohan saw her much-talked-about Playboy January/February cover leak online ahead of its scheduled "Ellen DeGeneres Show" release on December 15th.
Channeling Marilyn Monroe in a low-cut red dress, the 25-year-old was paid a handsome $1 million for posing for the men's magazine - with the issue hitting newsstands later this month.
More Photos Here
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| | Lindsay Lohan Will Debut Her Playboy Spread on 'Ellen' | | Added 12 years ago | Source: The Blemish |
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Since Lindsay Lohan’s Playboy pictorial will betasteful (read: no nudity) she’s safe to promote the spread on daytime tv. Ergo, Lindsay will be appearing on Ellen on Dec. 15 to promote her pictorial in the January/February issue of the magazine.
“The pictorial is absolutely fantastic and very tasteful, and will be accompanied by an interview that will let readers see another side of Lindsay,” her rep said.
The troubled starlet is rumored to have earned $1 million for stripping down, some needed cash as her legal woes and struggles with substance abuse have made it difficult to book any acting gigs. Page Six
$1 million for a non-nude Lindsay Lohan pictorial seems steep. Especially when she already did a nude spread for far less. I could have negotiated a better deal for Playboy. I’d offer her mid five figures and if her people wanted to play hardball, I’d just look at Lindsay and tap my watch implying her 15 minutes were almost up.
More Photos Here
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