| | |  | Gwyneth Paltrow News & Gossip
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| | Gwyneth Paltrow Has the Moves | | Added 11 years ago | Source: The Blemish |
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If you couldn’t tell, I was being completely facetious for that title. Gwyneth Paltrow does not have any moves. Unless you count wiggling around like you need to pee and timidly waving your hand in the air while Jay-Z and Chris Martin perform Run This Townas dancing.
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| | Gwyneth Paltrow in her 'punk rocker' Max Factor ad: does she pull it off' | | Added 12 years ago | Source: CeleBitchy |
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Max Factor clearly has their work cut out for them while employing Gwyneth Paltrow as their latest downmarket spokesmodel. Last month, the cosmetics brand revealed their first of “seven sides of Gwyneth Paltrow” by painting Goop in her “writer” persona, which Goop herself basically described as a creative person who goes out to dinner in London. Yes, it was ridiculous because Gwyneth unironically failed to realize that writers spend most of their time, uh, sitting at a desk and, you know, writing. As far as the rest of Goop’s makeup personas go, I personally can’t wait to see Max Factor’s take on her “cleansing” persona. Admit it — you’re curious too.
Now Max Factor has revealed Goop’s “rock chick” persona, I guess because she’s married to a “rock star.” Yes, those quotes are there for a reason because Coldplay really isn’t “rock” music, right? But this is about makeup, and Gwyneth’s look here is essentially all about the smokey eyes. She actually looks really good with her hair all mussed up (as opposed to her usual flat-ironed tresses) like that because I can sort of see some sex appeal bubbling under the surface. I’m not really crazy about the Pink sequinned dress though.
Here’s a behind the scenes video of Gwyneth gooping it up as a punk rocker chick. Does she pull it off? Not really, but it’s better than her “writer” persona.
Photos courtesy of Max Factor
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| | Gwyneth Paltrow can 'eat most men under a table,' tries to do so in video clip: gross' | | Added 12 years ago | Source: CeleBitchy |
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Gwyneth Paltrow just doesn’t stop. There’s something to be said for that level of persistence, but I feel like Goop could take a few months out of the spotlight and put her Goopy newsletters on hold, and everyone might actually miss her condescending ways. By the way, have you read the latest issue of Goop? Gwyneth basically opened a bottle of wine, surfed the web, and did a link dump. Oddly enough, that link dump does not include Celebitchy … I wonder why.
At the moment, however, today’s installment of Gwyneth Paltrow, multitasker extraordinaire (remember, she’s a writer among various other lofty pursuits), features Goop paying a visit to Jamie Oliver for a taped episode of his “Jamie & Jimmy’s Food Fight Club.” Jamie is so frenetic, but I’m glad he finally stopped calling himself “The Naked Chef” though. At a certain point, that innuendo started to get icky. He is still so full of lame gimmicks that I’m surprised Gwyneth agreed to appear on his show. Her dear friend Mario Batali would never pull this crap, right? Goop must have an ulterior motive for appealing to Jamie’s crowd, but I can’t figure out what that motive would be unless she is actually trying to impress the peasants who watch Jamie’s shows.
On this episode, Jamie allegedly makes Goop eat a hamburger, french fries, and milkshake while riding a roller coaster. Thankfully, there’s no clip available for that portion, but here is a video of Gwyneth taking the “Chubby Bunny” challenge, wherein she stuffs marshmallows in her face while repeatedly uttering, “chubby bunny.” At one point, she says, “This is gross,” and she’s correct in that statement:
So does this video make you like Goop more? I still feel like she’s looking down at as all through a face full of marshmallows. They were probably actually organic marshmallows made with vanilla extract culled from the exquisite tears of angels. I don’t doubt that Gwyneth does eat a lot of food on the regular basis though — she just exercises two full hours per day with her fraud trainer, Tracy Anderson, to get rid of it all.
Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and WENN
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| | Gwyneth Paltrow & Tracy Anderson cover Redbook, shill their weight loss | | Added 12 years ago | Source: CeleBitchy |
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Gwyneth Paltrow and her fraud trainer Tracy Anderson cover the new issue of Redbook. Isn?t Redbook too downmarket and gauche for Gwyneth? She?s so obviously slumming it with Redbook, but she must have agreed to it because she wanted to help Tracy peddle her crazy diet-and-exercise system to the peasants. And much like Tracy?s comments about pregnant women several months ago, she?s still a condescending bitch. Too harsh? This is the same woman who said, ?A lot of women use pregnancy as an excuse to let their bodies go, and that?s the worst thing. I?ve seen so many women who come to me right after (having children) with disaster bodies that have gone through hell, or they come to me years later and say, ?Oh, my body is like this because I had three kids.?? That?s how she talks about HER CLIENTS. So what does Tracy have to say about Gwyneth and vice versa?
After giving birth to daughter Apple in 2004, Gwyneth Paltrow got back in shape quickly. But after having son Moses two years later, she had trouble losing the baby weight. Enter Tracy Anderson. Without bothering to butter her up, Anderson quickly went to work on the Oscar winner.
“She was this force from the second I met her,” Paltrow, 40, tells Redbook in its January issue, on newsstands Dec. 18. “She pulled my pants off. I’ll never forget it. She was like, ‘Oh, my God, wow, I just am so surprised, because you look so good in clothes. I wasn’t expecting this.’ ”
On how Gwyneth marked her 40th birthday: “The morning of my 40th birthday, my children and husband woke me up with hugs and gifts, and I proceeded to have the best week of my life. I feel really happy being 40, now that I’m on the other side of it. There was definitely some uncomfortable anticipation. But I’m amazed at what I’ve been able to accomplish, that I’ve maintained my important relationships and have such incredible women friends, that I have two funny, beautiful children who can give me a real life. In a way, I feel like no one should make big life decisions until 40. It’s when it all starts to settle and become clear.”
Gwyneth, on the significance of her 40th birthday: “I’ve made a lot of mistakes in my life, but I have the good fortune of knowing what they are. I can recognize my limitations, forgive myself, and celebrate the fact that I have made it to this important birthday with the information I need to keep making corrections.”
Anderson takes a targeted approach to weight loss, identifying areas that need work and tailoring an exercise regimen to address them. Among the tips she offers Redbook readers:
? Those with heavier thighs and hips should work their upper and lower body equally, and limit the stair-climbing workouts, lunges and spinning.
? To lift and tone your bottom, dial down the running and spinning and do more back and side leg lifts that require flexing your glutes.
? To balance out a thicker core and bust, quit the Pilates and yoga and focus instead on high-impact aerobics, planks and fast-moving arm exercises.
A catered approach worked for Paltrow. “It did such wonders for my life, my confidence, my sex life, everything,” she says.
Anderson adds: “When you feel your best, you’re more confident in bed, It’s not lights-out, under-the-covers sex. It’s more like, ‘Take a look at this!’”
[From People]
Here?s a real question, ladies. WTF? Why would PAY someone to pull your pants off and say, ?Oh, my God, wow, I just am so surprised, because you look so good in clothes. I wasn’t expecting this.? I would burst into tears and then I would probably smack that person in the face. I don?t understand why this nasty, condescending attitude is all part and parcel of Tracy?s weight loss program. I don?t understand why this is acceptable, or considered a ?funny anecdote? about Tracy and Gwyneth?s relationship. Is Goop just so far down the condescending-Mean-Girl rabbit hole that she doesn?t even understand that this is not how your trainer should speak to you?
Photos courtesy of Redbook.
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| | Gwyneth Paltrow wants you to buy $52 worth of' Christmas wrapping paper?! | | Added 12 years ago | Source: CeleBitchy |
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Gwyneth Paltrow has added a special little holiday treat for the peasants this week! You know how she keeps adding to her ?Goop Collection? week after week? And all of the items are more and more ridiculous, like $270 acrylic trays and $515 sweaters and $90 white t-shirts? Yeah. Well, now you can buy all of those items for all of your (skinny) friends for Christmas, and you can wrap them in special Goop Christmas paper. Christmas goopaper!
Gwyneth joined forces with an LA stationary boutique called Sugar Paper to bring you? wrapping paper! You get four Goopy rolls of reversible wrapping paper? for $52!!!! Four rolls for $52. CB pointed out that at Sugar Paper?s site, you can see that one roll of reversible wrapping paper goes for $8. Meaning that four rolls would go for $32, meaning that you?re paying $20 extra dollars just because it?s Goopy. Oh, and you get special ?exclusively designed holiday tags.?
Maybe I?m crazy, but my Christmas-gift-wrapping situation is very, very budget. Like, I?m actually pretty good about Christmas shopping and getting most of it done by mid-December. And then on December 23rd I?m like, ?Oooooh, I totally forgot to buy wrapping paper!? so I stop by CVS or The Dollar Store and buy those $1 rolls of wrapping paper or $1 Christmas bags. Gwyneth looks down on me for being so peasanty, I know. I just don?t see the point of spending $52 on paper and gift tags! Now, I?ll go the extra mile and spend $2 on a really pretty, fancy bow. But that?s only for people I really love (like, my dog).
Photos of Gwyneth in Spain earlier this week, wearing Boss Black on a Spanish television show. Pics courtesy of WENN, Goop.
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| | Gwyneth Paltrow wants you to buy $56 worth of' Christmas wrapping paper?! | | Added 12 years ago | Source: CeleBitchy |
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Gwyneth Paltrow has added a special little holiday treat for the peasants this week! You know how she keeps adding to her ?Goop Collection? week after week? And all of the items are more and more ridiculous, like $270 acrylic trays and $515 sweaters and $90 white t-shirts? Yeah. Well, now you can buy all of those items for all of your (skinny) friends for Christmas, and you can wrap them in special Goop Christmas paper. Christmas goopaper!
Gwyneth joined forces with an LA stationary boutique called Sugar Paper to bring you? wrapping paper! You get four Goopy rolls of reversible wrapping paper? for $52!!!! Four rolls for $52. CB pointed out that at Sugar Paper?s site, you can see that one roll of reversible wrapping paper goes for $8. Meaning that four rolls would go for $32, meaning that you?re paying $20 extra dollars just because it?s Goopy. Oh, and you get special ?exclusively designed holiday tags.?
Maybe I?m crazy, but my Christmas-gift-wrapping situation is very, very budget. Like, I?m actually pretty good about Christmas shopping and getting most of it done by mid-December. And then on December 23rd I?m like, ?Oooooh, I totally forgot to buy wrapping paper!? so I stop by CVS or The Dollar Store and buy those $1 rolls of wrapping paper or $1 Christmas bags. Gwyneth looks down on me for being so peasanty, I know. I just don?t see the point of spending $52 on paper and gift tags! Now, I?ll go the extra mile and spend $2 on a really pretty, fancy bow. But that?s only for people I really love (like, my dog).
Photos of Gwyneth in Spain earlier this week, wearing Boss Black on a Spanish television show. Pics courtesy of WENN, Goop.
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| | Gwyneth Paltrow in black leather Hugo Boss in Madrid: pretty or peasanty? | | Added 12 years ago | Source: CeleBitchy |
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Sigh? don?t you sort of love it when Gwyneth Paltrow thinks outside of the (hair) box and actually does a jaunty side-part and throws away her g?damn flat-iron? She looks years younger when her hair has some body, and everything isn?t flat-ironed and middle-parted. These are photos of Goop in Madrid yesterday for the Spanish (international?) launch of Hugo Boss?s Boss Nuit Pour Femme. Gwyneth became the ?face? of the fragrance earlier this year, although it seemed like the commercials and ad campaign left without making much of an impression (because they were so? tacky and peasanty?). Goop?s dress is Hugo Boss. I kind of like her in black leather ? it makes her top-half look good. But I don?t get why it?s so baggy?
Earlier in the day, Goop appeared on a Spanish TV show called El Hormiguero, where she did an interview in Spanish, she played the guitar and sang AND she cooked an omelette. Of course. I guess her kids are still in LA, going to school, maybe? Gwyneth is such a superior mother, she only leaves her kids for a few days for these quick little promotional deals, then she returns home so that she can speak Spanish, play the guitar and cook an omelette for her kids.
Photos courtesy of WENN.
More Photos Here
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| | Gwyneth Paltrow & Chris Martin take their kids to school in LA' together?!' | | Added 12 years ago | Source: CeleBitchy |
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A few months ago, Radar claimed that Gwyneth Paltrow, Chris Martin and their kids were going to make LA their new homebase, after years spent in London. Of course, Gwyneth has always maintained a home in NYC, and she?s owned homes in LA too, but Goop and Chris always claimed that London was their real home. Well, as it turns out, I think Radar was actually right. I think Goop and Chris have pretty much relocated to LA, at least for now. Apple and Moses Martin now go to school in LA, and these are photos of Gwyneth and Chris walking their kids to school on Friday. SHOCKING. On so many levels!
First of all, Goop and Chris are rarely photographed together. And while Chris seems to be taking (minor) pains to walk behind his wife, hoping perhaps to not be included in the paparazzi shots, the photographers did manage to get him in the same frame for a few shots. This wasn?t even the first time they?ve been in the same frame within a week ? a photographer also got shots of the Paltrow-Martin family leaving Toys R Us last week too! Go here to see those pics.
By the way, have you been on Goop.com recently? Gwyneth has added a bunch of new ?Goop Collection? products, including a $55 V-neck t-shirt (that currently only comes in XS), a $490 black jumpsuit (it comes in XL, for the oversized peasants) and $195 hoop earrings. You know what?s really interesting though? Gwyneth has really been phoning it in as far as her weekly Goop-letter goes. She took off for the entire summer, and came back with more interest in her ?Goop Collection? and her Goopy life-advice. Well, I guess we should applaud her for not getting bored with our peasant-ness.
PS? I think Apple is going to be an unconventional beauty when she grows up ? like, she?ll be a model and people will endlessly compare her to Kate Moss.
Photos courtesy of Pacific Coast News.
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| | Gwyneth Paltrow & Chris Martin: School Duty with the Kiddos | | Added 12 years ago | Source: Celebrity Gossip |
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Tending to their parental duties, Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin took their kids Apple and Moses to school in Los Angeles today (October 26).
The ?Shakespeare in Love? actress held her daughter?s hand as they walked briskly up the sidewalk while Chris and Moses stayed a few paces behind.
And it?s been a week filled with family activities, as Gwyn and the gang hit up a Toys R Us store in Culver City yesterday (October 25).
Based on the big bags of goodies they exited with, it seems the Holidays are starting a few months early for the Paltrow/Martin household!
More Photos Here
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| | Gwyneth Paltrow Shows Some Skin in Cut-Out Dress | | Added 12 years ago | Source: Yeeeah |
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I hated the Michael Kors cut-out dress Gwyneth Paltrow wore to the Golden Heart Gala in New York last night, and not just because Gwyneth Paltrow was the one wearing it. It’s the cut-outs. They make her looks like a jack-o-lantern. And with her hair pulled back so tight, you really notices how pointy her ears are. She looks just like the Mirkwood wood-elf who moonlights as a dominatrix in in my latest erotic Tolkien fan fiction novel, “Between the Misty Mountains: The Whores of Lothlrien.” It’s a lot like 50 Shades of Grey, but with elves.
You can get Gwyneth’s look by wearing a cut-out dress with a stick shoved up your ass.
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