| | |  | Jessica Simpson News & Gossip
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| | Jessica Simpson announces she's having a boy, by joking about weiners (really) | | Added 11 years ago | Source: CeleBitchy |
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Is there any doubt that Jessica Simpson is a hustler? She’s making the talk show rounds to promote Fashion Star, using her unique brand of low-brow gross-out overshare humor. Have we had another celebrity like this? I mean there’s Snooki, there’s Jenny McCarthy (who merges sexy with gross) and there’s Jessica, who just laughs and talks about how she doesn’t brush her teeth, use birth control, or try to hold in her farts. I’m not even exaggerating with her, she does all these things and it doesn’t even seem like she’s trying to be self-deprecating. She just thinks that it’s interesting to us and that it’s normal to talk like this during nationally televised interviews.
Anyway last night Jessica was on Jimmy Kimmel, where she confirmed US Weekly’s exclusive that she was having a boy. It was a mistake though supposedly, because she dropped it in a joke about “weiners.” That was so planned. I can’t even with this girl, so I’m going to just use Buzzfeed’s excellent compilation of the ridiculous things she said:
“I can’t believe I’m pregnant again.”
“I keep planning on getting married but then I keep getting knocked up.”
“Maybe I should go back to when I was younger I was a virgin before I was married. So maybe I should just completely reverse and stop having sex until Eric and I are married.”
“I would really like to stop being pregnant.”
“Yeah, I’ve been vomiting… The crazy thing is that I never knew that a weiner could actually make me nauseous. Oh shucks! Well I guess told the world that I’m having a boy!”
“I just did it so crude, too. I feel awful. I talked about wieners!”
[From Buzzfeed]
Buzzfeed has the videos of Jessica’s interview if you’re interested, but those quotes pretty much say it all. She always says stuff like this, and now she’s taking it to the next level while using an “aw shucks” act to make it sound accidental. As I mentioned yesterday, I think this is going to get worse, especially when she’s promoting that sitcom she’s allegedly doing.
Here’s a clip of Jessica’s interview with Kimmel:
Jessica posted these photos on her Twitter recently:
Photos courtesy of WENN, Jessica’s Twitter.
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| | Jessica Simpson is definitely expecting a boy & she?ll definitely name him 'Ace' | | Added 11 years ago | Source: CeleBitchy |
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Last week, we heard about Jessica Simpson?s second foray into baby-naming. Us Weekly claimed that Jessica was dead-set on naming her second baby, gender unknown, ?Ace Johnson?. Some may roll their eyes at this reporting, but remember this ? everyone knew Jessica?s first baby name (Maxwell Drew) months before she gave birth too. She doesn?t keep her baby names a secret, and the tabloids find out and I have every confidence that this news is completely legit. Well, this week?s Life & Style confirms that Jessica is totally going to name her baby ?Ace? after her maternal grandfather, and that she?s definitely having a boy this time:
As recent reports swirl about the sex of Jessica Simpson?s second baby, multiple sources have confirmed to Life & Style that the pregnant singer turned fashion designer is having a boy!
?Jessica is having a boy and they are going to call him Ace or Acy,” a source close to the couple tells Life & Style, revealing that the name will pay tribute to her maternal grandfather, Acy Edward Drew, with whom she was always close. “Her grandfather is honored.”
?She and Eric are still deciding on a middle name, but they want it to be biblical,” the source continues. “Jess is religious and loves that idea.?
Though an insider confirms that Jess, 32, has decided to put her wedding to Eric Johnson, 33, on hold for now, one project the Fashion Star mentor is moving forward with is her baby-clothing line.
The insider explains, ?Now she can?t wait to start working on the boys? line, as well!?
Even if her designs aren?t ready in time for her son?s arrival, he?ll still be the best dressed newborn because Jessica?s little sister, Ashlee, tells Life & Style she plans to give her nephew all of her son Bronx?s hand?me-downs. ?I have a bunch of vintage shirts that I can give!?
[From Life & Style]
Was I the only one kind of hoping that Jessica would just have daughters? And that she would name her second daughter ?Ace?? Because that might have been pretty cool. But calling a baby boy ?Ace Johnson? just seems? I don?t know. Like, does she want her son to grow up to be a character in a Jim Carrey comedy? Or is this more of Eric?s doing? ?Ace Johnson? sounds like an athlete, only Ace would be the kid?s nickname, and his real name would be Francis or something.
As for the Biblical middle name… Kenaniah? Shammuah? Mahershalalhashbaz?
Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet.
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| | Jessica Simpson: Commercial Cutie in Los Angeles | | Added 11 years ago | Source: Celebrity Gossip |
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She?s well on her way to having baby #2 but that?s not stopping Jessica Simpson from continuing to bring home the bacon!
The ?Dukes of Hazzard? hottie showed up on the set of a commercial in Los Angeles yesterday afternoon, donning a lovely leopard print maternity dress to show off her baby bump.
Also nearby were Jessica?s daughter Maxwell and fianc Eric Johnson who both looked happy to be hanging out with her in between takes.
Ms. Simpson is said to be about five months along, which would put her due date sometime this summer. How exciting!
More Photos Here
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| | Jessica Simpson Naming Her Kid Ace | | Added 11 years ago | Source: The Blemish |
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If everything goes as planned, Jessica Simpson and Eric Johnson will name their kid Ace. His name will be Ace Johnson. A name straight out ofLeave It to Beaver.
Sources say Jessica hasn’t revealed how she and Eric chose the name. Although I like to think it’s because the kid was conceived after a night of Ace of Spades champagne. That or they sat down and thought to themselves, “Hm, what’s the whitest name I can think of?”
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| | Jessica Simpson wants to name her second baby 'Ace Johnson' | | Added 11 years ago | Source: CeleBitchy |
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Months before Jessica Simpson gave birth for the first time, the tabloids had already reported her daughter?s name ? Maxwell Drew. I think maybe it was In Touch Weekly that got the scoop, but Us Weekly followed through and confirmed the name before the birth. What does that prove? Two things: one, Jessica is the kind of mom-to-be who decides on a name before she gives birth (as opposed to a mom who waits to meet her baby to see what name fits); and two, Jessica talks about the names she?s chosen to people who love to gossip, so the baby names leak early. What I?m saying is that I believe this Us Weekly story ? Jessica Simpson is planning on naming her second child ?Ace Johnson?. Urgmph.
Cat’s out of the bag! Jessica Simpson’s growing baby bump isn’t the only thing that she’s showing off these days. According to a source, the Fashion Star mentor is eagerly sharing the name she’s already picked out for her second baby with fiance Eric Johnson.
“[She's] told people she’s going to name the baby Ace!” the source told Us Weekly. Simpson, 32, is already mom to 10-month-old daughter Maxwell. The singer hasn’t yet revealed how she and Johnson, 33, decided upon the name, however.
Just last year, Simpson revealed that Maxwell’s unique moniker came about as a tribute to both her family and her NFL player fianc’s.
Maxwell is Johnson’s middle name as well as his grandmother’s surname, and Drew is Simpson’s mother Tina’s maiden name.
“It’s nothing shocking and nothing you’ll have to add to the dictionary,” the bubbly mother-to-be told Elle last year prior to Maxwell’s birth and name reveal. “Still, when people hear it they’ll know ?why.”
Simpson and Johnson first confirmed their second pregnancy via Twitter on Christmas day. And the expectant parents couldn’t be more thrilled to expand their brood.
“Motherhood is a dream,” Simpson told Katie Couric back in September. “It really is absolutely amazing.”
[From Us Weekly]
?Ace? is more of a nickname. Like, someone named George is given the nickname ?Ace? because he?s really good at sports or something. Is ?Ace? gender-specific? Is it ONLY a boy?s name? Is this a confirmation she?s having a boy this time? Imagine a little girl named Ace Johnson. OK? that might be kind of cute. In my mind, a girl named ?Ace? would totally be a hellraising tomboy. A little boy named Ace? I don?t know. Ugh.
Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet.
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| | Jessica Simpson goes out for Mexican food, cheesecakes: is she off her diet? | | Added 11 years ago | Source: CeleBitchy |
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Here are some new photos of Jessica Simpson and her daughter Maxwell, who is really taking after her mom, right? Maxi is really starting to look like Jessica, I think ? it?s not just the big blue eyes and the blonde hair, either. They just seem to have the same facial expressions, which is cute. Jessica, Maxi and Eric Johnson (who, hand to God, looks like the actual K-Fed these days) went out to eat at Don Cuco in Studio City. Apparently, that?s a Mexican restaurant. Mexican food while pregnant? Just the thought of that is enough to give me gas.
Has anyone else noticed that it?s been a month (or longer) since we?ve heard anything about Jessica and Weight Watchers? Back when this second pregnancy was just a rumor, sources claimed WW was not happy with Jessica AT ALL, and that people were going to lose their jobs over this endorsement deal. But then WW made lemonade out of their farty, slutty-brownie-gorging lemons and went ahead and released the pre-filmed WW commercials starring Jessica, and there was the unofficial announcement that Jessica would be going off of Weight Watchers during this pregnancy. I think we can see that she really is off of WW now. Not only did she go out for Mexican food, over the weekend she and Eric went to The Cheesecake Factory too. And they took a bag of stuff home as well. I?m thinking that Jessica is either completely off Weight Watchers or she?s ?cheating? a lot.
By the way, I love how Jessica is obsessed with putting bows in Maxi?s fine, pale hair. I bet Jessica can?t wait until Maxi is old enough for a baby weave!
Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet.
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| | Jessica Simpson's Bumps Are Expanding | | Added 11 years ago | Source: HollywoodTuna |
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While all the tabloids are busy charting Jessica Simpson‘s new baby bump, who cares about that crap? I’m much more interested in her recent growth spurt in other areas. Which is why I’ve formed the Jessica Simpson Pregnant Boob Watch. Volunteers welcome. I’d have to get out my measuring tape to be sure, but I
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| | Jessica Simpson tried to get Eric a menswear line, but he can't design (at all) | | Added 11 years ago | Source: CeleBitchy |
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Here are some new photos of Jessica Simpson and her fianc/baby-daddy in LA yesterday. Eric took her to lunch for Valentine?s Day. You know what?s kind of funny/crazy? Jessica Simpson, Kim Kardashian and Duchess Kate are all due around the same time. This just shows you how different women with different body types ?show? in completely different ways. Kim has gotten wider but she still doesn?t have much of a bump. Jessica has popped early, as she did with her first pregnancy. And Kate barely has a bump at all. As for Jessica?s weight gain? I really hope everyone isn?t going to start yelling at her. Stop yelling at pregnant women for the weight they gain. It?s just rude. With or without the slutty brownies, Jessica is always going to look super-preggo. That?s just her body type.
Now, as for Eric? what does he do all day? I still don?t know. A few years ago, there were stories about Jessica putting him into some kind of managerial position with her fashion empire, but I?m not sure if that ever panned out. I?m pretty sure Eric gets a paycheck from Jessica INC., I just don?t know what he does exactly. According to Star, Eric recently tried to be a ?designer? but it went nowhere.
Jessica Simpson?s fianc just went from failed NFL player to failed fashion designer. Jessica has scrapped plans to put baby-daddy Eric Johnson in charge of a new menswear line.
Jessica?s business partners reportedly hated Eric?s designs, which a fashion insider describes as a bland collection of jeans, khakis and t-shirts.
?Eric is no designer, that?s for sure,? the spy says. ?The idea of a men?s line was nixed as soon as the presentation meeting finished.?
[From Star Magazine, print edition]
Sure?but the thing is, if you brand yourself correctly and really focus on quality, you could totally make a fortune designing jeans, t-shirts and khakis. But I guess there are enough people doing that these days?
Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet.
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| | Jessica Simpson, As Seen on TV | | Added 11 years ago | Source: Yeeeah |
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Jessica Simpson is all set to star in an NBC sitcom based on the life of Jessica Simpson. The question is, “why?” It’s like NBC isn’t even trying any more. The only thing that could be worse than a sitcom based on the life of Jessica Simpson is a sitcom based on a sitcom about the life of Jessica Simpson, sorta like there at the end on Seinfeld. There’s a lot of complicated math involved, but trust me, that would be exponentially worse. (Jezebel)
Lance Armstrong finally admits to doping in an interview with Oprah Winfrey, but doesn’t cry give more than one-syllable answers, leading me to speculate that he’s either a narcissistic jerk incapable of relating to anyone other than Lance Armstrong, or a cyborg from the planet Douchetron 5 sent here from the future. Robots can’t cry, you know. The interview went like this:
Did you ever take banned substances to enhance your cycling performance?
Yes.
Was one of those banned substances EPO?
Yes.
id you ever blood dope or use blood transfusions to enhance your cycling performance?
Yes.
Did you ever use any other banned substances like testosterone, cortisone or human growth hormone?
Yes.
In all seven of your Tour de France victories did you ever take banned substances or blood dope?
Yes.
I have a feeling this whole public apology is just his way of setting the stage for his new line of Lance Arrmstrong brand masking agents and blood test invalidators. Live well and lie well in 2013!TM (Huffington Post)
Hilary Swank grew up in a trailer park, dropped out of high school and lived in a car as a teenager, but now she’s a millionaire Oscar-winner. For one brief shining moment, you were almost better than Hilary Swank. That’s what you should take from this story. Also something about following your dreams and believing in yourself, blah blah blah blah. (Mandatory)
Lena Dunham is huge right now, and no, that’s not a fat joke. Her hit HBO show “Girls” racked up Golden Globe after Golden Globe, she’s on the cover of Interview magazine, and she was named Time Magazine’s “Coolest Person of the Year.” And now, Howard Stern himself is apologizing for calling her tubby.
?I?m not that fat, Howard,? [Dunham] said [when she called into his show]. ?I don?t mean to take major issue with you about this. I?m not super thin, but I?m thin for, like, Detroit.?
Stern agreed, explaining that he just meant that she often played up the ?fat angle? on the show.
?You?re not obese or anything,? he allowed.
?Thank you. Another thing for my gravestone,? Dunham laughed.
“You’re not obese or anything” is about the nicest thing my husband’s grandmother’s ever had to say to me. Along with “you barely notice the scoliosis when you’re sitting down” and “Remember, a buffet isn’t a dare, Abby.” (Skinny vs Curvy)
The chick from Vampire Diaries has her neck photoshopped to giraffe-like proportions. She couldn’t support a melon like that without the aid of those neckrings they wear in Myanmar. (Photoshop Disasters)
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| | Jessica Simpson on conceiving her second child 'it was like a one-night stand' | | Added 11 years ago | Source: CeleBitchy |
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Yesterday Kaiser reported that Jessica Simpson had inexplicably signed a deal to star in a sitcom based on her life, on NBC of course, in which she would play herself and actors would play the parts of her husband and family. It sounded like a terrible premise and a dumb twist on her reality show, in which we learned that she’s not the brightest bulb and that she shares way too much information about her bodily processes. (That was honestly the first time I’d ever heard the “dropping kids off at the pool” expression. Eww.) Jessica was on The Tonight Show this week to promote Fashion Star and she of course gave TMI about how her second, unexpected pregnancy came about. She did have some funny self-deprecating things to say about how much weight she gained in her first pregnancy, adding that she “had fun” at the time and realized later “that it wasn’t all water weight.” Anyway here’s some of what Jessica said. She also confirmed that she’s due “in the summer.” It’s going to be a summer of babies! Duchess Kate and Kim K are also due around that time.
On her last pregnancy
The last time I ate everything in sight. I was really happy to be pregnant and I just didn?t even step on the scale. I was the person who turned around and said, ‘Just don?t tell me, I?m having fun.’
I guess I just didn?t realize you could gain that much weight that quickly. I had fun doing it but once I had Maxwell I realized that it all wasn?t water weight and I had to really work hard. In four months I lost over 50 pounds.
On her favorite food
Everything. I didn’t really make any healthy good decisions.
On how Weight Watchers responded to her pregnancy
I think that they were as shocked as I was, because it was so soon and I was hitting all these goals and everybody was celebrating and it was like ‘ah, there she goes again’ But they were really supportive I mean, what can you do? I just said ‘Next time around, I’ll promise I’ll be healthier throughout this pregnancy.’
On how this pregnancy is going
I’ve been puking. I’ve been really, really sick so I can?t wait to actually be able to crave something like I did in my first pregnancy. I?m due in the summer so I still have a ways to go ? hopefully I start feeling better.
On if she’ll get married soon
We?ve had two different wedding dates, but he keeps knocking me up. I?m doing it very backwards, I know! I?ll just keep my legs crossed this time.
On how she got pregnant again
I was extremely shocked. I was shocked because I was going through a lot of hormonal changes, trying to get back to the old, vibrant Jessica. And, you know, it was kind of like a one-night stand. And it happened, all over again!
[Quotes via NBC video, Extra and Access Hollywood]
Classic Jessica. The audience audibly groaned when she said “I’ve been puking.” It’s not a “one night stand” when it’s your husband or boyfriend and the guy lives with you, even if you haven’t had sex in a while. Semantics aside, this wasn’t a bad interview with Jessica and she came across as funny, albeit unable to censor herself. I just want to say – holy chi chis! (Credit: Michael K) Her boobs are huge and they’re pushed up into a shelf like Christina Hendricks’ rack. Here’s another screenshot I took. Also, her hair looks very wig-like.
As an aside, I just want to say NBC sucks for the way they treat their shows. They can hire Jessica Simpson for what will surely be a mediocre comedy but they can’t even be bothered to air the already-completed episodes of the amazing, critically acclaimed cult hit Community. NBC is excellent at getting quality shows, but they always screw it up somehow. I’m just waiting for the axe to fall on Parenthood, I love that show.
Jessica Simpson on her wedding plans:
Two photos above credit: FameFlynet
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